Lets talk about energy and sex! Some may know of it as Tantric Yoga or Taoist Sexology practices. I have practiced and learned methods from each system but I wouldn’t consider my experiences a result of strictly following those paths. I think they are excellent systems of teaching about energy and I don’t want to confuse the two! I like to practice, learn and build from my personal experiences. I will keep it simple and reflect on some experiences and lessons i’ve learned and hope you can take from it for your personal benefit. There is almost the flip side, the womans’ perspective on energy via intimacy. I would like to see more posting about the experiences with using this type of knowledge and Im sharing my experiences in efforts to encourage others to make a deeper connection with your surroundings.
A few years ago I took a stand point of fascination and interest of this information before I began practicing it. I wasn’t sure if it would work or not. I wouldn’t say I needed it .. my sex life was fulfilling without me knowing this fascinating tantra/taoist info but still there is always more to learn. With that simple idea in mind I began to study and practice energy work along with my yoga practice! Before I even began attempting to merge/connect/interweave with someone else’s energy I thought it would be best if I learn how my own energy works first. I found techniques from the Tao (Cultivating Sexual Energy Male & Female editions)
useful in linking the flow of energy to the flow of breath then bringing that energy up the spine and circulating back down and throughout the body. I also noticed that yoga helped cultivate or build this energy up so that is more apparent in a sense.
This was the foundation to what I practiced, simple but efficient. Ive felt many sensations and experiences that I classify as lessons. Fast forward some time (1 Year) … I began practicing with someone .. at the time I was dating a Chinese woman that was also interested in this type of practice. We would begin by meditating and doing yoga. After that we would begin our session of intimacy. I focused on my breathing and getting the energy flowing up my spine etc…. This was the first time I did energy work with someone. Once I brought the energy up I noticed that I was having some clear visions almost like dreaming but I’m still in the act of intimacy.
I remember seeing people walking outside, I also saw my friend walking in the subway with drums It was so clear that I literally followed the vision with my head as if they were walking past me. Ive seen images etc during meditation so I was familiar with the experience but it this vision had a power source now and the images of my mind was almost as clear as if I had my eyes open. At that point I began putting two and two together… where I direct the energy is where the energy will go, opening sensations of that energy point even more. In that case it was my pineal gland.
Even though I released (ejaculation), my energy was high and circulating the energy kept me wide awake even when we were finished. At this stage in my knowledge I was still releasing and not fully conserving or (in)jaculating but I was still more energized than normal while watching the images of my minds eye until I finally went to sleep. So far so good and everything was flowing well for the most part but i noticed our sexual appetite began to rise! When I wasn’t in the mood to connect it was like she would throw a mini tantrum which I found kind of humorous at the time but I noticed that was unlike her….. From traveling and life we grew apart but I still practiced energy work on my own time via meditation and yoga.
The next time I would get a chance to practice with someone turned out to be packed with information and unexpected experiences. At this point in my practice and study I understood more through experience, I stopped eating meat and felt even more vital than before. How + where to store energy was my updated focus as well as how to see/feel it or accumulate it quicker through focus on breathing. I will go into the experience I found the most impactful to me. It began outside, I was meditating by myself then my partner at the time a wise woman slightly older than me came out to join. I began showing her a method that I use while in sphinx pose to bring energy into my solar plexus. While teaching her I began to feel the effects of what I was doing so I zoned out and forgot all about her even being there. I began to feel the normal swaying that i usually do and began to focus it in on a specific point (solar plexus). It felt as if i was moving really fast in a forward direction.
What I saw looked like and felt like a endless view of stars more than my view capacity could grasp.. beyond peripheral vision. I had no real sensations that would even indicate that I possessed a physical body but I was still conscious. I couldn’t determine how much time had passed or anything. My friend said my name and it felt as if I were a tuning rod and every fiber of the vibration in my name hit me like a physical object and I began to come back into the awareness that I had a physical body slowly. All I could do was roll over onto my back… The sun was setting when we began but it was pitch black out now. I felt super charged and began laughing hysterically while staring up at the stars. The feeling was as if I really happy to have gone some where very familiar and it was far from here but then I began to cry because I was back here. It was a strange feeling, I don’t think I would have chosen to come back if it were a choice to make.. that is a thought I often reflect on. In the moments of bliss a very clear thought came to me or a knowing came to me of how important life force energy is, I no longer wanted to spill life force energy recklessly it was almost like fuel/energy to get back to the place/space I was just in and i definitely wanted to go back. Soon after we began our session but this time it was different. The energy that i tapped into during the meditation session carried over into our intimate exchange.
I felt like I was holding 1000x the amount of physical energy as well as mental concentration that I normally would have, If there was one time I can say I actually felt like a God in human form this energy was the closest thing to what I perceived as that. The lesson of conserving every bit of energy seemed to be at the forefront of my mind but It was like I didn’t have to put so much (thought) effort into keeping the energy flowing within and not releasing during orgasm. This energy felt like a steady warm buzzing sensation. The lessons I learned with that experience would be that breathing controlled the amplitude of energy. Slow exhalation and inhalations eased the flow of energy in a calm manner. Fast exhalations sent more energy but there was a disconnect in feeling it. When my partner would get close to the point of orgasm I would know because I could feel it within me. It is like you become a mirror to each others sensations. I could “pull” that energy within me by using inhalation and feeling the flow of energy through the(chakra) points along my spine and finally to the crown.
When I held my breath at the top of inhalation the energy it felt like it began to build more and it caused my partners muscles to contract in a pulse like manner almost like it wanted to pull the energy back. On the exhalation I did the reverse and felt the energy flowing back into her bringing her back to the point of orgasm. At that point I realized its an ebb and flow of energy using breathing to control the motion. Using different patterns of breathing for example caused different effects for example breathing at the same time can align the energy literally making it feel as if both of you have come together as one person. Other methods would be inhaling during her exhale and vice versa this helps build the flow of energy in a back and forth fashion. The more you ‘build’ the energy the more intense and difficult it can become to contain it from the male perspective at least. I believe women naturally have a higher capacity then men for this type of energy exchange.
On other occasions we have felt and used this energy to release physical and mental tension within each other. Setting an intention before you begin helps. There have been times that we would sit still and allow the energy to flow freely causing our bodies to move/contract/release all by itself, versus the typical thrusting that would be performed during normal sexual intercourse. Practice of relaxation and allowing the energy to flow through you will create the movements. This worked well for us and brought on a much deeper experience. I’m certain that the connection between us grew stronger as well, you begin to have a very sharp sense of what the person is thinking throughout the day, and how they are feeling. We even began having lucid dreams of each other. I would say it definitely strengthens the bond between two people!
Theres two sides to each perspective, this is the womans’ perspective of this moment. Energy via intimacy womans’ edition. – Maati Ra
After what seem like timed stop, i’m not sure how long we engaged in foreplay, I realized time is non existent
when you indulge your focus into the sensations of energy. I allowed, begging my partner to enter my heavens from what seemed like the second phase of our connection. As he entered, I slowly inhaled, and he slowly exhaled, we both as a union paused for just 2-3 seconds . As I slowly exhale, he inhaled. There is was no movement, his phallus connected, deep penetration, my body began to shake slightly and his moans revealed his expression of gratitude and appreciation for this moment and our presence together. With every slow inhalation, while remaining still but relaxed, I would contract, using kegel techniques, squeezing his phallus. Letting go of the hold on my exhalation. During my exhalation, I began concentrating on positive thought and intentions, blessing him with success, joy, fulfillment, love, enlightment, power, and greatness. With every inhalation, I’m giving praise, honor, gratitude to my lover, to the ancestors, and universe, divine creation. My partner on the other hand, when I would once again inhale, he would , exhale only to inhale in my exhalation. In his exhalation as Im releasing my contraction, he in turn, with no other movement, began to contact his phallus in my yoni, the sensations I felt were indescribable.
I could feel the energy building reaching climax but before reaching my peek he would pull the energy from me with his inhalation. We continue breathing, pausing between, kissing, visualizing this flow of energy leaving me, only to return, in a cycle flow from my his head to my head down my spine through our gentiles, back through him, up us spine, through me again in kiss and touch , connection of ours crown chakra. I found myself in such a blissful state I left my body. I’m not sure where I went to, but I left, yet still very aware of the sensations in my body at the same time. I’ve had to at some point, stop breathing, only because I would her him whisper in my ear very softly, “breathe”. And I would catch my breath, bringing my awareness back to the presence moment.
Eye contact is vital to intimacy and a deeper connection. It had been something very challenging to do with my past relationships. I noticed during our connection, he began gazing at me. Me, willing to take our intimacy higher in connection, scared but I looked directly into his eyes, at that very moment our spirit communicated with one another. It seemed as if our eyes communicated in ways our words could not. Just like sound, the energy connection is much greater when the eyes are kept connected as much as possible. I saw him completely, knowing what’s truly deep inside through this connection. I felt an overwhelming knowing of love, my spirit filling active in this energetic exchange. Finally, my partner began to move, in a slow, still deep penetration, inhaling with penetration and exhaling pulling out ever so gentle and slow. Still staying in sync with his breath, eyes still connected, I express to my partner how much I love him and how thankful to share this experience. I replied, “ I love you more,” and I began to cry, a happy peaceful cry.
During intimacy its a choice, You can hold your energy, storing it for yourself or release. I would normally hold off and not release but in this particular moment , I wanted to climax. I wanted to let go of any restrictions ,expectations, I just wanted to relax, allow, and be. I desired a full body orgasm. I began by directing my awareness to my entire body feeling every sexual sensations in every cell of my body. There was no need for words, my partner, being very present, felt what was happening and with the last inhalation from him, he penetrated, this time again not withdrawing but holding, contracting his phallus, holding me tight as I exploded with energy, I exhaled releasing with sounds of deep relief and pleasure, an almost overwhelming sensation like no other. Just like yoga, the fundamentals of breathing are key. Breath is energy and the key to relaxation, allowing for a complete release. Over time and practice a full body orgasm will become more easily obtain. (Excerpt from Energy Via Intimacy : Womens Edition)
I would not suggest practicing this with just anyone. With all this being said emotions ( energy in motion) tend to be high. Everything becomes more strengthened/intense outside of intimacy. If you find or feel as if a persons energy isn’t right it will bring that to the forefront after you share this type of connection. Things can become even more complex when dealing with multiple men/women in this type of energy exchange. It feels like you are connected to that person energetically in a way that is different than when you are simply physically intimate or better known as “just fucking”. Practice being aware of the energy by meditating and aligning the flow of your breath with the feel of the energy. Once you get that down pact begin to explore and share your experiences so that we all can learn from it! Space and distance is not an obstacle I have one friend that practices long distance energy work in Italy and it is effective. This is only a small % of what I can translate from experience into words but until next time… Use your energy to manifest what you wish to see! The world is yours! Peace
Featured Image : ArtofMere_
People to Research
Dr Alim Bey (Science of Breath) ,
Jewel Pookrum (Melanin Information)
Mantak Chia ( Tao Techniques of Cultivating Energy )