Tag Archives: tantric sex

Tantric Sex vs Just F#*%ing

A friend shared with me  a while back that they were sexually frustrated. I asked why do you have sex, their answer was manifesting with orgasmic energy and feeling that connection. I feel everyone has their own preference of pleasure. Two people can have totally different objectives but still find mutual pleasure. As she expressed her desires sexually all I could think of in my mind was … our connection doesn’t feel like what she is expressing. To be blunt It felt more like fucking. Physical based pleasure, grabbing pulling and ultimately ejaculating etc….like porn. There is much to learn about how a person expresses themselves during intimacy but that’s another article in itself. Don’t get me wrong our connection has its deeper moments of being in sync with breathing and discussing new sensations but for the most part it didn’t feel like the intense energy exchange I’ve shared with previous partners. The frequency is also different I noticed the amount of sex had during fucking was a lot more. It’s like eating meals that don’t fill you up, you must keep eating and eating and eating in comparision to tantric sex I felt more than satisfied and it feels like the connection last longer.

To me there is a thick line between practicing tantric sex and just fucking. Energy work in general requires discipline and fucking requires genitals that function.  The question was returned to me,  What is my “reason” for sexual desire … I answered ” It is to learn more about energy and apply what I learn when I practice specifics method of circulating energy.”  To me sex/intimacy with someone is an extension of a connection you should first have with yourself. If it feels like the path to an orgasmic manifestation  can only happen with someone other than yourself then it could cause frustration when that person(s) isn’t available.Was this always my mindset no… but things change and you learn more in life. When it comes to doing energy work in combination with sex, I say the work starts with yourself first.


The more you and your partner know of chi, prana, reiki, kundalini etc through experience the better. This makes progress easier in learning with each other. I noticed a few differences I think would be good to share so you can determine if your tapping into the power source of sexual energy or just fucking.  During tantric/energetic sex vulnerabilities tends to surface. In tantric sessions emotions are much more intense. These emotions can run the gamut from hysterical laughing, crying, confusion, release, bliss plus so much more. Letting all that out may not be what you intended but when it happens your in a very vulnerable place emotionally.  “Fucking” didn’t bring up those past traumatic wounds that may be deep within.. well at least it never did when I was simply aiming to reach ejac/orgasm.

The recharge, I noticed feeling more energetic after having a tantric session. I could run a few miles, type up an article, do a photoshoot then another tantric session. Just fucking leaves me drained of energy and I just want to sleep after or eat to replace what I just lost. To compare it with fitness fucking is like sprinting quickly to the finish line (ejaculation) and tantric is more like a paced jog around the track for however long you would like to run.  I understand some people love that big burst of energy so it all comes down to preference at the end of the day. Last point to make, in fucking, orgasm and ejaculation seemed all the same.  Through practicing yoga and meditation I learned how to experience orgasm without ejaculating. Not only is it possible but you can redirect the orgasm to wherever you focus on in your body. You don’t need to have sex to feel an orgasm or manifest! sex definitely helps bring up your energy quicker but remember breathing is the key.

The more you and your partner know & experience about chi, prana, reiki, kundalini etc the easier it is to make progress in learning with each other. If your with someone that isn’t familiar with deeper aspects of connection via intimacy teach them how to breathe and become more familiar with themselves first. I’m always learning more and  Mantak Chia books are good, i’ve found that practice and observation during meditation can teach you equally as much about the flow of energy.

Leave a comment and share your experience and keep learning. – Focus 


Khajuraho Temples of India

Khajuraho Temples are situated in a village in Madhya Pradesh, bearing the name of Khajuraho. sextemple11js9The rural ambience and the rich cultural heritage of the village serve as the perfect backdrop to the temples, which depict the sensual pleasures enjoyed by human beings. Khajuraho temples also reflect the maturity of the people belonging to that decade. One of the most popular tourist attractions of India, the temples were constructed somewhere between 950 and 1050 AD, under the rulers of Chandel Empire.sextemple07di2

Each of the temples comprises of three main compartments i.e., the entrance (ardhamandapa), the assembly hall (mandapa) and the actual sanctum (garbha griha).

The temples have been divided into three groups, based on their geographical patterns, namely western, eastern and southern. The theme of the Khajuraho temples is mainly the celebration of woman and her countless moods and aspects.

According to one theory, the erotic carvings on the Khajuraho temple complex in central India were created to prevent the rain god Indra from accidentally striking the holy place with lightning. Indra was a keen voyeur and would have baulked at damaging such a source of pleasure. sextemple09kn3These days the rain god isn’t the only one to enjoy a peek at what goes on behind closed doors; hundreds of thousands of visitors flock to Khajuraho each year to see the exquisite adults-only carvings adorning the village’s temples.

For a full list of each Temple and the god it was dedicated to check out iLoveIndia  for more.

Tantric Sex Flow

Ever experience a heart orgasm?

Many people able to reach deep ecstatic sexual states liken these to transcendental spiritual experiences. They discover that the distinction between the physical and the spiritual is not as clear as they were taught. They may even feel that they have come to know God, or ultimate reality, through sex. Tantra Yoga and the Kama Sutra both view sexuality as vital aspects of the path to enlightenment.

The approximate Sanskrit definition of “Tantra” is “web” or a union of opposites that, when united, becomes one with everything in the universe. Tantric practice unifies the many contradictory aspects of the self (e.g., masculine and feminine, spirit and matter, dark and light) into a harmonious whole.

Developed in India, Tantric practices were at their height between 500 to 1300 AD. Today Tantra is a living system designed to promote rapid growth towards enlightenment. Tantra’s components include yoga, meditation, deity worship, whole-body health, and Ayurvedic medicine.

Connecting the Heart and the Physical Orgasm

Here is a simple practice you can try the next time you are making love. Both men and women need to learn to connect the genitals and the heart. Touching these two areas at the same time can help a person experience this connection, which carries the potential for immense healing.

The Orgasmic Heart

During foreplay or oral sex and while you are stimulating the genitals of your partner, place your hand on his or her heart. Think about experiencing a pure heart orgasm or extending the orgasmic release from the genitals up to the heart. You may want to wave your hand over your partner’s body with a special focus on the heart. Remind your partner that orgasm can spread up to the heart.

From personal experience I know the orgasmic heart is effective. You will feel the same orgasmic feeling but starting in your heart and bursting throughout your body. Sometimes I began to laugh hysterically after orgasms. It is uncontrollable ecstasy and could make your partner quite jealous if she cant figure out how to get her heart and body  to feel the same intensity.” 

Three Basic Ideas to Tantric Sex:

1) Raising Sexual Energy
This practice aims at extending your pleasures from sex for a longer time so that you can take it to a higher spiritual plane. They stress is on building up the pleasure so that you can continue enjoying a pre-orgasmic period for a longer amount of time. This practice uses massage, oral sex, and sexual intercourse to raise sexual energy.

2) Exchanging Sexual Energy

In this practice, you think of yourself as a part of a circle of energy. One of the best positions to try this is to “spoon” with your partner. Cuddle him or her and rock back and forth, giving and receiving energy from one another. You can start off the process by gazing into each other’s eyes for some time before you begin spooning.

3) Taking Sexual Energy
This was one of the earliest practices of Tantric sex. In this process, one of the partners visualizes and “sucks” the sexual energy of the other during sexual intercourse. It used to be predominantly a male practice for youth and longevity, but nowadays women also practice taking sexual energy. Anal sex is a particularly potent method for a woman to take male sexual energy in order  to awaken her kundalini.

Tantric Orgasm

Tantric philosophy talks about two seemingly different types of orgasm, the physical orgasm and the heart orgasm. At first appearance they may seem contrary to one another, but on closer inspection one complements the other.

Tantric practice encourages us to be in our hearts 24 hours a day. That blissful state can be equated to an orgasmic state of being with “heart energy” transferred to all that we do. In Tantra this is sometimes referred to as the “right hand path,” and some practitioners achieve this state of being through meditation, yoga, compassionate states of mind, mantra chanting, and celibacy.

In the “left hand path,” sexuality is the vehicle one rides to achieve the same state of bliss. Developing a consciousness with orgasm provides a gateway to an ability to attain higher states of consciousness. As in the “right hand path,” the bliss state can then be brought to all aspects of life. You really can “get high with a little help from your friends.”

Full Body Orgasms

Sexologists have identified several forms of orgasm. In women there is the clitoral orgasm, which tends to be localized to the genitals. The vaginal orgasm involves the G-spot and other areas of the vagina. A blended orgasm involves the clitoris and the G-spot. Men’s orgasms tend to be more general, though through Tantric practices the plateau can be extended for long periods of time. Tantra adds another kind of orgasm, the energy orgasm or heart orgasm.

As you go further into this practice you are able to begin to have full body orgasms, or energy orgasms, simply by breathing them, without any physical touch. This powerful energy is then much more available to you in your everyday life, sometimes just by breathing!

When the paths are blended, the possibilities for personal growth expand exponentially, and the duality between the types of orgasms vanishes. Just as breath is of the utmost importance in meditation, it is the consciousness of breathing that can be the tool to a transformational lovemaking experience.

Source: What is tantra? 

Success through Stillness

Pick up a few gems and jokes that were dropped during this interview with Russell Simmons. An index of the topics covered can be found below.

1:12 – Russell’s Book: Success Through Stillness
2:20 – The Art of Meditation
7:43 – Russell’s Sex Life
12:39 – Russell on the ’N’ word
19:21 – Russell on Kanye West
27:53 – Russell’s Ex’s
33:40 – Not Giving up on Your Dreams
36:29 – Amina Buddafly
44:25 – Gay A.A.C.P
51:35 – Black Hollywood Slave Movies


Check out the release of success through stillness. Now available here