A friend shared with me a while back that they were sexually frustrated. I asked why do you have sex, their answer was manifesting with orgasmic energy and feeling that connection. I feel everyone has their own preference of pleasure. Two people can have totally different objectives but still find mutual pleasure. As she expressed her desires sexually all I could think of in my mind was … our connection doesn’t feel like what she is expressing. To be blunt It felt more like fucking. Physical based pleasure, grabbing pulling and ultimately ejaculating etc….like porn. There is much to learn about how a person expresses themselves during intimacy but that’s another article in itself. Don’t get me wrong our connection has its deeper moments of being in sync with breathing and discussing new sensations but for the most part it didn’t feel like the intense energy exchange I’ve shared with previous partners. The frequency is also different I noticed the amount of sex had during fucking was a lot more. It’s like eating meals that don’t fill you up, you must keep eating and eating and eating in comparision to tantric sex I felt more than satisfied and it feels like the connection last longer.
To me there is a thick line between practicing tantric sex and just fucking. Energy work in general requires discipline and fucking requires genitals that function. The question was returned to me, What is my “reason” for sexual desire … I answered ” It is to learn more about energy and apply what I learn when I practice specifics method of circulating energy.” To me sex/intimacy with someone is an extension of a connection you should first have with yourself. If it feels like the path to an orgasmic manifestation can only happen with someone other than yourself then it could cause frustration when that person(s) isn’t available.Was this always my mindset no… but things change and you learn more in life. When it comes to doing energy work in combination with sex, I say the work starts with yourself first.
The more you and your partner know of chi, prana, reiki, kundalini etc through experience the better. This makes progress easier in learning with each other. I noticed a few differences I think would be good to share so you can determine if your tapping into the power source of sexual energy or just fucking. During tantric/energetic sex vulnerabilities tends to surface. In tantric sessions emotions are much more intense. These emotions can run the gamut from hysterical laughing, crying, confusion, release, bliss plus so much more. Letting all that out may not be what you intended but when it happens your in a very vulnerable place emotionally. “Fucking” didn’t bring up those past traumatic wounds that may be deep within.. well at least it never did when I was simply aiming to reach ejac/orgasm.
The recharge, I noticed feeling more energetic after having a tantric session. I could run a few miles, type up an article, do a photoshoot then another tantric session. Just fucking leaves me drained of energy and I just want to sleep after or eat to replace what I just lost. To compare it with fitness fucking is like sprinting quickly to the finish line (ejaculation) and tantric is more like a paced jog around the track for however long you would like to run. I understand some people love that big burst of energy so it all comes down to preference at the end of the day. Last point to make, in fucking, orgasm and ejaculation seemed all the same. Through practicing yoga and meditation I learned how to experience orgasm without ejaculating. Not only is it possible but you can redirect the orgasm to wherever you focus on in your body. You don’t need to have sex to feel an orgasm or manifest! sex definitely helps bring up your energy quicker but remember breathing is the key.
The more you and your partner know & experience about chi, prana, reiki, kundalini etc the easier it is to make progress in learning with each other. If your with someone that isn’t familiar with deeper aspects of connection via intimacy teach them how to breathe and become more familiar with themselves first. I’m always learning more and Mantak Chia books are good, i’ve found that practice and observation during meditation can teach you equally as much about the flow of energy.
Leave a comment and share your experience and keep learning. – Focus